Books: Emma

I’ve done the (un)lovely pleasure of reading this classic so you don’t have too! Aren’t I the BEST?!

First off, Emma is the most hypocritical character you will ever meet. EVER.

She thinks she’s a matchmaker that can best even Cupid (spoiler: she is terrible at matchmaking). Also: She thinks she is doing a service for her friend, Harriet, whom is, well, in a lesser place in society by trying to hook her up with men higher up the ladder so to speak.

Why is it so important that Harriet climb the social ladder? Because Emma wouldn’t be able to hang out with her if she married the successful farmer. That’s *way* too middle class for Emma. She’d have to be all, “Oh, Harriet’s just somebody that I used to know. I don’t keep company with the commoners.”

The hilarious part is that when these rich dudes (namely Mr. Elton) refuse her friend, Emma has no problem showing her disgust with these supposed “gentlemen”. To think that their refusal is based solely on Harriet being of inferior birth?! To say that they reject her company because she hasn’t any nobility to speak of?! How crass! How rude!

And yet these shady guys Emma berates are so very like Emma, who will delete Harriet from her Facebook if Harriet dates the nerd in second period. Really. She is Regina George from Mean Girls. I was waiting for her to tell pull out a burn book and paste Mr. Elton’s picture with sayings like, “This jackass is a fugly, self-serving idiot.”

But to be fair, Harriet is a freaking hot mess. The girl falls in love with anyone Emma tells her too. At one point, even Emma questions if the girl can fall in love with more than three men in a year. Why does she fall in love with three different men? Because Emma sucks at matchmaking. (But she’ll tell you she’s amazeballs at it.)

Does Emma learn her lesson and find the man of her dreams? Well, yeah (would you expect any different from a Jane Austen novel?), but it’s all rather abrupt and only after she somehow manages to villainize the “dear friend” for trying to climb too high up the social ladder. Yes, she really does do that to her friend, and yes, she feels it only natural for her friendship with Harriet to fizzle out when she chooses the successful farmer anyway. Isn’t Emma a piece of work? I think so.